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Matando Saudades

Google translated:  "kill miss" "kill longings" "kill homesickness"

This month, Byron and I had the opportunity to "matar some saudades."  Yes, that's an English word in the middle of a Brazilian phrase.  We do that a lot in our every day conversation around the house.  It's Expat/MK/TCK talk.  Things that are more beautiful or easily understood in one language get thrown into our English chats.  There just isn't a word in English just like "saudades."  So, it's often added to the English-Portuguese mix of our speech.  The actual definition of the word in Portuguese just seems to go beyond a feeling of homesickness or some silly longing.  It's the whole gambit of missing loved ones and wishing for another place and time.   

Boating on the lake like old times
Our oldest, William, came down from the States this past month and stayed for five weeks.  He was able to "matar a lot of saudades" while here.  He saw old friends, visited old haunts, ate his favorite foods, and drove on his old trails.  His girlfriend, Kerri, got to see up close and personal what that longing for another place is all about in the life of any TCK {third culture kid}.  She may have even been able to share in a little of the sadness of saying good-bye to loved things, people and places as she got to know and care some herself.

Visiting old haunts - Colina do Horto, Juazeiro do Norte
 Along the wild ride touring sites and what not, Byron and I were able to "matar some saudades" as well.  In Fortaleza we got to walk by the old house we bought on Rua Santa Constância.  We knocked on the doors of some old neighbors and enjoyed some catching up time and hugs.  We walked through my favorite grocery store and made a few purchases.  We had lunch with friends and went to our old church.

Rua Santa Constância, 94, Fortaleza CE

Sometimes revisiting old memories can be traumatic and difficult. I was a little overwhelmed as we walked down our old street and stood in front of our old house to pose for this picture.  My heart longed for our middle son to be there, too.  But was thankful that he is doing well albeit was not there to share the moment being in the USA.

Treasure Island visit - July 18, 2016
One place I was especially not longing to "matar any saudades" was on the island.  I had repeatedly said and thought to myself that I didn't want to go back and had no desire to see it again.  My memories were fine left just where I had left them - in the refuges of my mind.  I was afraid.

Ah, but dear old William wanted to go so badly.  I gave in and decided to open my heart and mind and clear the cobwebs out and jump on the band wagon.  Off we went.  We didn't really have enough time.  The gang would loved to have spent the night but it wasn't very feasible.  We did enjoy a lovely day.  We toured the main camp, commented on some changes.  William, Kerri, Papa and Greyson hiked to the far end of the island to look for crystals.  William was hoping to find a place where our boys and the Vieira girls had buried a "treasure." Time ran out and that memory was left for another opportunity.

I can be thankful for this past month for the many good moments to add new "saudades to my list.  Last night, Byron commented that it was sad to pass by the office/guest room and not see Kerri sleeping in her bed.  And it seems the room has a new name now - Kerri's room.  Come back soon, Kerri - we need to make some more memories and "matar some new saudades." 


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